It was the
summer of 08 and Dru and I, being married for six years, had been throwing
around the idea of having a baby for a while.
I’d be ready and he wouldn’t, then he’d be ready and I’d start second
guessing my readiness and back and forth for months. Finally, we matched up and
decided we were as ready as we’d ever be.
We started “not preventing” and never really thought about it. When my period would come, it was a mixture
of “Welp, not knocked up yet” and “Whoo hoo, I get to go out this weekend!”
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| Dru and I circa 2008 going on a date. |
I had
remembered reading an article written by a woman with several young children
about what to do before you get pregnant.
One of the things on the list was to just stay up all night with your
husband. Spend the night talking,
laughing and whatever else you want.
Watch the sunrise after a night of really getting to know your
significant other and then sleep all day together.
Well, I
thought this was a wonderful idea. We
decided to give it a try one night. We
didn’t spend it alone though. We decided
to invite some margaritas to join us. We
had a really fun night, and besides what the margaritas made a little fuzzy, a
night I will never forget. We didn’t
quite make it to sunrise but it was memorable anyways.
That night
led to a positive pregnancy test a couple of weeks later followed by nine
uncomfortable months and then the day that took us from two to three and
forever changed our lives. I think back
on that list that I can barely remember and wonder if I could talk to my
pre-pregnant self, what I would tell myself to do before becoming pregnant for
the first time.
I definitely
would suggest the staying up all night, or as long as you can manage. It was a lot of fun and very bonding. One rule, no TV! Just hang out, talk and laugh.
TRAVEL!! Please past Brandi, travel more. You have no excuses, plan fun little weekend
trips on a regular basis.
Speaking of
traveling, do spur of the moment things more often. Pack a light suitcase and just drive
somewhere with no plans. On a random
night, dress up and head out with no reservations or plans of any sort and just
see where it takes you. Call up a friend
and have her meet you for no reason for lunch or coffee or whatever. These are all things that in the future with children
will require so much planning and scheduling, it barely seems worth it.
Spend some
time by yourself. Take yourself shopping
and take as much time as you’d like. Buy
yourself something pretty because in the future, you will feel guilty for
everything you ever buy yourself that isn’t essential to your survival. Even if you are lucky enough to get a good
amount of time to yourself, you will most likely get multiple phone calls and
texts asking questions that only you have the answer to.
Read
more. There will come a day when
finishing a chapter without interruption is a wonderful accomplishment. When you will have over a dozen things on
your list of things to do during your 45 minute “downtime” which still requires
you to be on call should a passing car make too much noise waking your child
ending your alone time twenty minutes early.
I’m sure
there are many other things I could add to this list but this will suffice for
now because my “downtime” was over a long time ago. I have been spending the last hour trying to
finish this while one child plays in her dollhouse and I nurse the other only
to be interrupted because of a hungry child, then a dirty diaper, and by that
time I have lost my train of thought and have to reread what I just wrote only
to be interrupted again because I’m being asked to read the book I’ve already
read three times today.
I wouldn’t
trade it for the world… most days. Some days
I wish I could call up a girlfriend and she could meet me for a fancy lunch and
we could talk about anything we wanted only being interrupted by the server
asking if we would like another glass of wine.
Yes, yes we would.
What do you
have to add? Anything you wish you would have done before your life changed
with that positive pregnancy test?
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